NO SUGAR TONIGHT
by LnBen
Summary: We all know how Stephanie's body reacts to sugar-withdrawal.Now it's Ranger's turn to handle the "sticky" situation.
1. Chapter 1

**NO SUGAR TONIGHT…**

**CHAPTER 1**

Ranger lay on his back trying to co-ordinate his breathing and heart rate.

He could feel the sweat pooling in the hollows of his abs and running through his hair at his temples. _Damn, one more session like that and I'm gonna need medical attention._ _You're not getting any younger in spite of all your efforts._ He smiled at his own thoughts.

Stephanie lay next to him. Her hair was actually damp with sweat. Her breathing was just as labored as his. And her smile was just as broad. Only she was thinking about the awesome orgasms she just experienced.

"Babe?"

"Hmm?"

"Babe, would you make me a promise?"

"Depends on what it is. I'll try."

"Babe, the next time you decide to go on a diet, could you give me a couple of days heads-up?"

"I guess. Why?"

_Think quick man, you don't want to spoil a good thing._ "Well, you know how you get when you give up sugar. If we are going to have these afternoon trysts, I need to schedule my afternoon appointment for later in the day. I hate to run off and leave you in bed like this."

"Oh, I never thought of that. I'm sorry. How can I make it up to you? When's your next appointment? She purred.

"I'm late already. I'll just take a quick shower and be out of here in five minutes." He lied, but for a good reason…he needed the rest.

Ranger should have known something was up yesterday when Steph went right past the Tasty Cakes display at the deli and ordered two turkey clubs on whole wheat, one for him and one for her. Then last night, she not only initiated the sex but practically demanded it. Their morning "quickie" wasn't so quick. The pleading call to come up to 7 for lunch was his un-doing. He was in top shape, and all night lovemaking was not uncommon for them. But this was different. It was feral and demanding. It was definitely fun but not something to try to squeeze into a tightly scheduled day. Besides that the men knew he went up to the apartment for lunch, something he never does. And they knew that Steph was up there waiting for him. He could give a rat's ass if they knew he was getting laid, but there better not be the slightest snicker when he returned to the floor. He was 'the big dog' and entitled to certain benefits.

Seven minutes later he walked on to 5 and headed for his office. It was afternoon shift change. Cal looked up, and noticing Ranger's wet hair, said innocently "Doing some afternoon cardio, boss?"

The entire control room went deathly quiet. Hal and Lester were trying their best to stifle their laughter. Earlier, they had told Cal that Ranger wasn't in his office but was getting some cardio exercise. This practical joke on poor Cal seemed very funny at the time. In retrospect, it was a death wish.

Ranger glared at Cal, his jaw muscles visibly tightening. "No, why would think that?"

"Well, th...the guys here said th...that you were working out. I was just making conversation." Poor Cal was stuttering. He knew Ranger was upset and he just didn't know why.

"Hal and Lester... mats…7:30 AM. Cal you can come and watch if you like. You might learn some new moves." Ranger turned his back and headed to his office. He didn't want any of the men see him smiling.

Tank knocked on the boss's door and was answered with "In". Ranger had his head back on his chair and both hands on his desk. For a minute, Tank thought he was meditating. "Everything OK?"

"Stephanie's on a diet. She hasn't had sugar in 48 hours."

"Crap. How are you holding up?"

"Fine for now. In fact it's kind of a challenge. Maybe after a few days, when her body is finished with the sugar withdrawal, things will return to normal. If not, I'll need you to help me out"

If a black man could terminally blush, Tank did just that. His eyebrows traveled completely up his forehed.

Ranger put his head back and laughed. "No, never, not even close! I have an escape plan that requires your assistance."

What's the plan?" Tank asked, breathing a huge sigh of relief. He knew that Ranger wouldn't share such intimate details unless there was no other choice.

"When it time, just mention to her how thin she is looking. Remind her that I don't like my women to skinny. Hopefully she will be at the bakery within half an hour. You really can have too much of a good thing."

"Never had the opportunity to find out. You know, there must be a million men out there who wish they had your problem. Have you thought about just slipping some sugar in her food without her knowing?"

"No, it has to be her decision and her problem to control. Just stand by incase we need to resort to Plan-B.

Tank hesitated before leaving the office. "You know poor Cal was set up."

"Oh yeh and payback will be a bitch. I don't mind the men having a little fun; but they stepped over the line into my private life. I won't have it and I'll nip it in the bud now."

"Roger that!" and Tank was out the door. For Ranger, it was back to business and another cup of Ginseng tea.


	2. Chapter 2

**CHAPTER 2**

_The mat idea seemed good yesterday. What was I thinking? _Ranger slipped out of bed being extra careful not to waken Stephanie. Quick thinking in the middle of the night had saved him from imminent groin damage. Thank goodness Stephanie enjoyed his non-invasive techniques of satisfying her sexual needs. Trouble is, they won't surfeit for long. He didn't shower. He just grabbed a change of clothes and went down to the gym. He could shower after teaching Hal and Lester some lessons in respect…or at least fear.

Ranger had to concentrate on not laughing at the sight waiting for him in the gym. Hal and Lester stood at the end of the Tatami mats, looking exactly the way two school boys would look waiting in the principle's office. Cal was standing off to the side. Surprisingly he too was wearing his 'gi'. Poor fellow really believed that he was part of a training session. The two penitents on the mat knew better.

Thirty minutes later; Lester with a new cut on his lip and Hal, limping slightly left to shower and report for their shifts. Ranger then took Cal under his wing and showed him the leg sweep that had up-ended Hal and left him crying "Yield". That was the safe word to end activity on the mat when things got exceptionally heated. Hal probably had a broken bone in his foot, judging from the swelling and colorful bruise, but he fought as long as he could. Ranger reminded himself to give him more desk time to recuperate.

A nice, long, hot shower was all Ranger needed to face the day. That and some breakfast. He had slipped out of the apartment trying not to make any noise that would awaken the Nymphomaniac presently sharing his bed. _It has to have run its course by now. It can't last much longer. I_ _can't last much longer. I'll be damned if a 5'7" woman can get the best of me! I went through Hell Week at Bennington. I can get through this._ Self pep talk under his belt he headed for the office: Strong and confident.

Her call came at 9 o'clock. "I woke up and you weren't here" Stephanie was using her disappointed voice.

"Babe, you looked so peaceful and last night must have been tiring for you. I thought it best to let you sleep. I know you have some FTA's today and I want you at your best" _Lightning is going to strike me dead._

"You are so understanding, Novio. I want to look my best for you."

_OK, not only will lightning strike me but the earth will open up and swallow me._ "Babe, I'm here to support you during this difficult time. You always look good to me. I don't want you to do this for me. I love you as you are." _Please, please take the hint._

"Joe would just wimp out on me when I would try to better myself. You just stand by me and support me. I'll make sure to save some of my energy just for you tonight." With a kiss into the phone she was gone.

Ranger hit the button on his desk and within a minute Tank was standing in front of him.

"It's time." Ranger looked so serious and focused; it left Tank a little puzzled.

"Time?"

"Plan B. Put it in action today."

"Boss, it's only been three days! She's just a bit of a girl."

"You aren't there. You have no idea."

"OK, Plan B." Tank walked out of his office shaking his head. Ranger had one hell of an interesting life.

Ranger went back to his computer search of "The Uses of Saltpeter in the Military" and had another cup of Ginseng tea.


	3. Chapter 3

**CHAPTER 3**

Tank, with optimal mission planning, managed to catch Steph as she stepped off the elevator in the RangeMan garage.

"How's it going, Tank" she asked with a cheerful wave. "Got you hands full, I see. Need some help?"

"I'm just restocking the SUV's from last night's take-down. Sure, wanna get the door for me. Wow, I almost didn't recognize you. Did you loose weight? Not that you needed to, understand." _I'm getting almost as good at this as Ranger._

"Thanks. I'm on a strict diet. No more junk food for me."

Knowing how much you love doughnuts and fried chicken, it must be hard for you to stick to it."

"It is. But Ranger said something a couple of weeks ago about my not being able to stick to anything I start. You know, like staying in shape and taking those self-defense classes. He's right. I need to have more self control. So I plan to stick to this diet for a whole week."

_Boss man, you brought this on yourself. This is getting better and better. _"How long have you been on it?" _As if I haven't heard about it over and over for the last 96 hours!_

"Four days. I have three more to go. Ranger has been helpful. I want him to be proud of me." Steph was smiling ear to ear as she helped Tank check the first-aid kits.

_Lordy, he hasn't been helpful. He's just been trying to survive. I'm going to Hell for this, I just know I am. _Tank put on his serious face.

"Well be careful, little one. I know for a fact Ranger doesn't like his women too skinny." _Mission accomplished. Get out. Fast!_

"Ha! I'll never be accused of being skinny! Three more days and I can say I actually stuck to something till the end. Maybe I can convince Ranger to celebrate on Sunday. Got to run. See ya later." She was in her car and off to nab one of her street weirdoes.

_Oh crap! Oh holiest of shit! Plan B is doomed and with it any hopes of Ranger's sanity or at least his libido. _Tank took a long, slow walk up the five flights of stairs. Ranger would be back from the police station soon. Tank was mentally checking the update to his will and health benefits. If he could co-ordinate his timing he might be able to postpone the inevitable at least for a while.

_Well, Boss, it's only three more days. That's what I'll say. I won't mention the upcoming planned celebration. That would drive him off the edge. Think! Think, man. Contingency plan. You could just leave him to his own devices. No, not that he wouldn't do it to you, and revel in watching you squirm. You have to think of the men, not to mention you own shinny black ass. _

_As a team, Ranger and I have out-thought some of the wiliest fugitives. We have planned night drops into hot zones that came off without a hitch. We will not be defeated by a woman as naïve as Stephanie Plum. No sir! Just wish I had the foggiest notion of what our battle plan should be._

Tank went back to the fifth floor grateful for the "distraction" of normal business. Things were running smoothly until he heard the sound. It was the dreaded sound of the elevator opening up on five. Out stepped a haggard Ranger. He headed straight to his office and as he passed, barked out "Tank, my office, five minute"

He could feel the blood pooling in his feet as it drained slowly from his face._ Lord, take me now. I am ready to go. I don't even care where you send me. Anything has got to be better than where I am about to go._

Five minutes later, he knocked on Ranger's door.


	4. Chapter 4

**CHAPTER 4**

Tank knocked and entered Ranger's office. Surprisingly he wasn't behind his desk, but standing in the middle of the floor, waiting for Tank. _Oh, this is not good. Stand tall, man, stand tall. _"What's up, boss?" He managed to say without his voice raising an octave.

"Do you know where I have been for the last forty five minutes?" This was said through clenched teeth, while two coal black eyes tried to laser through Tank's brain.

"Trenton PD, finishing up the paperwork from yesterday." It was a statement but Tank could hear his voice rising at the end turning it into a hesitant question.

"Nooo. That was an hour and a half ago. For the past forty five minutes I was on the lower level of the municipal parking garage, in the back of a Jeep

Cherokee, flat on my back! Want to guess who I was with or what we were doing?"

Tank could form no words. He was afraid to make a sound. As a counselor, he had been trained in identifying signs of PTSD; and right now, Ranger was exhibiting about half of them.

"I thought the plan was for you to talk to her today. Did you?" Ranger seemed a little bit more in control.

"Yes, Boss, I did. But geeze, man, she's not going to stop"

"What do you mean; she's not going to stop?" There was a slow and steady cadence to his speech that made the tiny hairs on Tank's neck stand straight up and his "Buddies in the Bag" want to crawl back up to safer places.

Sometimes when you are under a lot of stress you get to a certain point when you figure…What the fuck! And suicide by action or verbalization seems the next logical step. "Hell, Carlos, don't get all bent out of shape with me or her for that matter. This whole thing is YOUR fault. It was your frigging 'Let me help you with your follow through' that got you into this!" Tank had accepted death and was ready to go. Instead Ranger just stared at him, mouth open.

"Stephanie told me that you told her that she needed to follow though on things she starts. She told me that she realized that how important this was both for her and you. So she is sticking to this diet for a whole week…no matter what."

Ranger pivoted right there in the middle of the floor and walked slowly to the window, placing his hands on the sill and lowering his head. For a brief moment, Tank couldn't be sure that he wasn't planning on jumping. But Ranger began to speak slowly and unnervingly calmly.

"Have you ever been fondled in bed while you sleep?"

This question just about caused Tank's head to explode. He could actually feel his brain scrambling trying to follow Ranger's thought process. One thing he was absolutely sure of, his best friend and long-time comrade-in-arms had faced one too many battles. And was rapidly loosing this one along with a good piece of his mind. "Ah, what did you say?" _Maybe I just heard him wrong._

"You are asleep. You start dreaming that you have a hard-on. The dream becomes more and more real and you suddenly realize that you are not dreaming. You have one rip-roaring boner because someone has been fondling you while you slept. You're afraid to open your eyes because you will see her sitting next to you, smiling and waiting to be ravaged again and again. So you keep your eyes closed and pretend to be asleep; but now it is actually becoming painful and you have no choice but to open your eyes and face whatever fate awaits you. Do you have any idea what that is like?"

"Frankly, Boss, that's never come up." _Oh Jeeze, oh Jeeze now is not the time for double entendres! _

"Well, it sure has come up for me. I've been facing it every night for four nights. I try not to fall asleep but I'm to damn exhausted and nod off and then it starts. I haven't had four straight hours of sleep since Saturday. We have got to come up with a plan. I will not loose this campaign. She has got to give in first. It's a matter of Latin-lover pride…my pride!"

"Shoot, just tell her. It couldn't hurt any more than going through all of this."

Ranger spun around and suddenly looked rejuvenated. "What did you just say?"

"I said, just tell her…"

"No. No. Before that."

Tank had to think for a moment. "Shoot?"

"That's it! That's the answer!" Ranger was positively ecstatic. He grabbed Tank by both arms and practically hugged him.

"My God, man, you want me to shoot Stephanie?" _I need to somehow notify Bobbie and get some sedatives in here STAT._

"WHAT! Jeeze, man, sometimes you just scare me" Ranger looked at his Number Two with incredulity.

"I SCARE YOU? HAVE YOU HEARD YOURSELF LATELY? I'm seriously thinking of taking you off the board and putting you on mandatory leave!"

Ranger stared at Tank with the 'you wouldn't dare' look on his face. Tank stood firm, not backing down.

"I meant that I am going to treat this like any skirmish I've been in. Sun Tzu. The Art of War. Bring the battle to the enemy. Act don't react. I'll make Steph so tired of it all that she won't think about sex for weeks."

"And how do you plan on doing that? You look like the only bull on a dairy farm now!"

"Mental superiority, my man. Mental superiority. If I think like a stud I can be that stud."

"I hope all that thinking doesn't kill you; or at least put you in the hospital" Tank grumbled.

"I wonder if we are covered for that." There was a gleam in Ranger's eyes and a smile starting on his face.

"Want me to check with Human Resources in the morning?" Tank was now starting to smile.

"It's never come up?" Ranger was now chuckling.

"If I think like a stud, I can be a stud?" Now Tank was chuckling

Suddenly both men began to laugh uncontrollably. Tears were streaming down both their faces. Tank was holding on to the back of a chair. Ranger was sitting on the front of his desk. Neither man could stand. They laughed until both of them had a need for air. When they could breathe normally again, Tank asked "What do you need me to do?"

"Not a thing. You've done more than you needed to do. I have a plan all worked out. Just keep an eye on my six." Ranger was his old self again.

They slapped each other on the back. Tank shook his head as he walked out of the office. _Sure wish I knew what his plan is. This is Stephanie we are dealing with. Nothing ever goes as planned around her. _


	5. Chapter 5

**CHAPTER 5**

The men in the control room were aware that Ranger was in a nasty mood. One look at him as he entered the fifth floor was enough to make each one wince. His curt order to Tank and the way he stormed into his office made them all wish that they were anywhere else but in front of the monitors. Most likely nothing good would be coming out of that office.

Then the yelling started. It could be heard beyond the closed door. Sweat was beading up on faces of men who normally stay cool and calm as loaded weapons are pointed at them. Every one of them was thinking the same thing. _Was it me? What did I screw up? Please Lord; let it be the other guy._ Each man tried to make him self as small as possible in their chairs. (This is no small feat for men who averaged almost 6 ft.) Not one man spoke. Not one man looked up. All were waiting for Armageddon.

When the sound made it into the control room it was surreal. So surreal that at first it was unidentifiable. But then it became clear. Laughter! Belly-busting laughter was emanating from the boss's office. Surely this was the end of the world. First Lester, then Rico and eventually all of them turned to look down the hall towards the office. They were expecting the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse to ride down the hall and end their agony. If it was laughter it must be of the evilest of intentions. There was a communal gasp as Tank exited the office and headed down the hall. He was wearing a grin that spread across the considerable landscape of his face.

"What are you all looking at? Get back to work" he said with his regular voice, but then actually chuckled to himself as he sat at the command desk.

Half an hour later, Ranger came out as if nothing in the last hour had happened. He said something to Tank and was gone. To a man, curiosity was killing them. Over break, there would be bets placed as to what just occurred; if they ever found out at all.

Lester spoke first, reporting exactly what his job description required. "Ranger is off line." Normally when a RangeMan vehicle went of the board, it meant trouble. When the boss went off line it meant "none of your business". But it still had to be reported.

Tank's answer was a simple "Noted". He obviously had expected it and didn't want a big deal being made of it.

Damn, the boss led a complicated life!


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER 6**

_This is really stupid. This is humiliating. This is the only answer outside of admitting defeat. Damn, Babe, why couldn't I fall in love with a normal woman? Hell, if you didn't give me a daily challenge I probably wouldn't have fallen as hard as I have. Honestly sometimes I long for a simpler life…where just getting shot at or threatened made sense. You never disappoint Babe, that's for sure. _Ranger was on his way to Newark. He had called ahead and explained what he needed. It was one of the most embarrassing conversations of his life. He vowed never to have one like it again.

Takeko (see FF – "Realization") greeted him at the door. She was not happy and the usual smile was not present. "Dulce, this better be good."

"Takeko, I don't like this any more than you do. But there is no other way. You are the only one I could trust to get what I need." Ranger grumbled in reply.

"I could help you. There are techniques, exercises, things that are more natural and acceptable" she pleaded.

"There isn't time. I've thought this out carefully and this is the only answer. Please, don't give me shit about it. I'm all ready on the edge."

"Very well. Here you are." Takeko handed him a small envelope. "But when this is over, we need to talk."

"If I survive the week, I promise to call." With that, he kissed her gently on her cheek. "Thanks" and he was gone.

Takeko shook her head and laughed. _Dear, sweet Dolce what have you done to your life now?_

By six o'clock Ranger was back at his desk. Working through the pile of paperwork in his in-box kept his mind off of what was to come. He found himself actually looking forward to dinner and Stephanie-time. He had a lethal weapon now. She didn't stand a chance. _It wasn't cheating. It was more like giving her what she needed. After all that's what relationships are all about…giving you partner what they need. What harm can it be if you use outside help to please your partner. Don't kid yourself man, you just don't want to loose._

Seven o'clock rolled around and Ranger got the phone call.

"Novio, I've missed you." Steph was using her purring voice.

"Dinner is ready, are you?" He could be so romantic when he wanted to be.

"I'm 10 minutes away and hungry"

"I hope you are. I'll be waiting, Babe." He hung up. _Three more days, I can do this. I am a US Army Ranger for cripes sakes. I've been trained in withstanding torture. I have been trained to give as good as I get. I will win this battle or die trying. God, I hope all that cardio training pays off._

Ranger tapped the water cooler in his office and went to his desk. Carefully he opened the package that Takeko had given him. Three small, diamond shaped, blue pills toppled onto the desk top. With a deep breath he took the first pill, placing the others back in the envelope and locking it in his desk. _What nature doesn't provide, medical science will._ He had about an hour before the Viagra would take effect. That's enough time to eat and prepare. Ranger was battle ready.


	7. Chapter 7

**CHAPTER 7**

Waiting in the apartment for Stephanie to arrive, Ranger kept fidgeting with the wine corkscrew. He was actually looking forward to the night's activities. According to all his research as a healthy, sexually active male, all the Viagra would do is lengthen his activity timeline.

_I certainly don't need help getting it up. But lately, with Steph off sugar, my staying power has been challenged. This should be the answer to both our needs. _With that thought still in his mind he heard his resident Sex Goddess coming through the door. Let the games begin!

"Hi, Babe how was your day?" he asked as she dropped her keys in the tray on the sideboard.

"Fantastic. Look no noodles, no pizza stains and no bruises. With all this energy I have lately there's no FTA that can out think me or out run me."

_And no woman on earth that can out fuck you either. _"Great. Dinner is on the table and I just poured us some wine." He gathered her in his arms and gave her the mother of all welcome-home kisses.

"Hmm, should dinner wait?"

"No, Babe you will need the energy. I intend to burn all the calories you can spare later tonight." _Mr. Blue don't let me down!_ The double meaning of that thought created an involuntary smile that, of course, Steph took as a personal promise.

Halfway through the meal Ranger was surprised to find that his 'business' was doing business on its own. He was getting uncomfortably hard. _What the hell, I wasn't even thinking about sex yet! Geeze, my wanger has a mind of its own. That wasn't in any of my research._ Not one to loose an opportunity, Ranger rose from the table and stood behind Stephanie. He gently nuzzled her neck and spoke softly and low into her ear. "Maybe it's time for dessert."

"Just give me a few minutes. I had a busy day and I am starved for some food. I know you and your self-control. Dessert will be fabulous but not just yet."

_I am becoming the 'Man of Steel' and she wants to finish her veggies! I didn't take that pill for my benefit! OK, so maybe I did, but still, this is serious. I can feel every tooth on my zipper. Eat fast, Babe, eat fast._

Ranger poured a second glass of wine for himself. (An unheard of occurrence on a normal day)

Finely after what seemed like an eternity, Steph put down her fork with "Oh that was so good. Ella is just the best. Don't you think so?"

"Yep, the best." _God, I'm going to burst right here._

"Now about dessert…" with that comment Stephanie came to Ranger's chair and sat lap-dance style. "Ooo, you are so ready!"

"I'm at your service. Ready to burn those calories, Babe?"

Steph kissed him with plenty of tongue and started rocking on his lap. _No, no don't do that. I'll cum right here. Think quick man, do something! You are acting like a teenager with his first hard-on._

Ranger immediately starting taking off her shirt and bra. She reciprocated, throwing his shirt on the floor and unbuckling his pants. His wood popped up like those springy snakes in the old peanut brittle gag can.

"Oh my, you are so hard!" Steph was delighted. She dismounted, dropped her pants and stripped Ranger in split seconds. She settled back down on his 'prize' and began moving in earnest.

With every trick he had ever learned, Ranger was able to hold back until she had her first orgasm. When he let go the release was immediate, uncontrollable and surprisingly long. _Shit, I thought the pill was supposed to extend the night not blow it in the first 15 minutes! Damn!_

"Oh, you came so quickly. What will we do for the rest of the night?" She seemed do disappointed.

"There's plenty of me for the rest of the night. I just wanted you so badly I couldn't wait. _Now WTF am I going to do. Stupid pill. I should have never relied on science._

They kissed and cuddled for a few minutes and she stood up leaving him on his chair. As she walked away an amazing thing was taking place in Ranger's nether regions. He didn't get soft. In fact he was fully recharged and ready for action. He followed behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Just where do you think you are going. That was just a taste of what's to come." _I hope._

Steph was breathing hard as Ranger placed her hands on the wall. He entered her from the rear and heard her gasp at his size and ability. _There is definitely a problem here. I am harder than I have ever been. I feel like a fireman with his hose ready and nozzle open and no water. Just use your nozzle to keep her satisfied. The water will come in time. I hope._

The wall orgasm was followed by mutual satisfaction on the oversized ottoman in the office/den. It was a strange feeling of detachment for Ranger. His business had a life of its own. The normal resolution phase was reduced to minutes and completely disembodied from Ranger. His back muscles, leg muscles and arm muscles were screaming with strain. But they were held prisoners, hijacked by his penis and unable to think for themselves.

Whatever Stephanie's needs, they were met in kind and more. Normally she is not overly vocal when making love. When having raw sex, she growled and screamed like a wild animal. The most physical episode occurred on the bedroom floor, and Ranger is sure that Ella and Luis Guzman who lived on the 6th floor heard every passionate outcry. _I don't know whether to apologize tomorrow or just be embarrassed and ignore it. What time is it anyway? Only 10 o'clock! I'm gonna die._

The medical warnings about erections lasting more than four hours were playing in Ranger's head. Sadly his research hadn't gone deep enough to warn him that the half life of Viagra is about four hours. It stays active, just less immediate for 12 to 24 hours. His night had just begun.

The desire was there. The need was there. His body was not his own. It was controlled by 8 inches of rogue muscle and that muscle didn't care how much the rest of the body protested.

In bed after another coupling, Steph indicated that perhaps that was enough for a while, a long while. "We have been at it like rabbits since dinner. My poor doda is getting sore. Isn't your dick?"

"It's a little sensitive but looking at you when you are aroused just sets it off into its own world" _If only you knew. It's practically its own person at this point. I feel like its designated driver!_ "Let's get some sleep." With that, he gathered her in his arms in a cuddle, covered her with the quilt and closed his eyes. _Sleep, please, that's all he needed._

Two o'clock in the morning and both were captives of their libidos. Stephanie awoke to find Ranger 'standing at attention' and didn't want it to go to waste. He was just as surprised to still have any 'soldier' left in him and faced the enemy as any well trained Army Ranger would. _God, I miss combat. Things were so much easier then. _

Morning came quietly, thank goodness. Ranger woke first. He panicked for a brief minute when he looked at Stephanie. She hadn't moved from the position he left her in last night. He watched for a long moment to assure himself that she was still breathing. He gently touched her arm only to be rebuked with a push and "Not now, I need sleep."

"Just letting you know I'm here, Babe. I'm going to take a shower. Want to join me?" _Please, please say no. _

"Next time. Last night was phenomenal. Now I know why women all over the world fantasize about Latin lovers. You are my Cuban Energizer Bunny in bed but my batteries need recharging. OK?"

_There IS a God in heaven and he is watching over me. Thank you, God. I owe you. _"Get some rest, Babe. One more day and we have the weekend to spend together." _Maybe sleeping pills would be the answer. She could sleep through Friday night into late Saturday. I'll see what Bobby has in his supply room. No, now you are thinking like a damn junkie. Man up! Two days and you still have two pills. Just go take that shower and clear your head._

Getting out of bed is instinctive. You do it every day. This morning Ranger discovered that his arms and legs had been converted into cement appendages. His lower back no longer felt comfortable in a straight position. His man package felt like he had been practicing full contact Karate without a cup. He shuffled into the bathroom like an elderly Cuban grandpa. Even his morning piss hurt. _How in the hell am I going to make it into my office without looking like I just fell off the building? Two more days…no way._


	8. Chapter 8

**CHAPTER 8**

The headache was blinding. _Hangovers from R&R were easier than this. My hair hurts to touch! A nice cool shower is all it will take. This is insane._ Ranger struggled into the shower and felt the calming effects of soothing cool water on both his head and private parts. In his dressing room he selected the most comfortable pair of boxers he owned…a soft, silky, black pair. _The less friction the better;_ he thought. He stood through his breakfast, avoiding the eventual discomfort he knew he would feel when sitting at his desk. _Now how to get through the day with some dignity._

Entering the fifth floor, Ranger gathered himself up as if he were about to face inspection at Bragg. Tank took one look at him, however, and winced.

"Jeez, did Ella starch your drawers? You are walking like someone used you as a wishbone."

"Just can it! I'm in no mood. What's my schedule like?" Ranger was trying, albeit unsuccessfully, to maintain a professional manor.

"You have a meeting on-site with the DataLink people scheduled at 9 o'clock regarding the Ocular ID system. It's Friday so you have payroll to approve by 4. Other than that you are open. Want me to reschedule with DataLink?"

"No, the account is too lucrative and the technology could be useful for other accounts. Do me a favor and get the file from my desk. I really don't want to walk that far." Ranger looked so spent and pitiful that Tank withheld any smart remark and just went to retrieve the file.

"I'll be on the road for most of the day. Call me only in an emergency. And make damn sure it is an emergency."

"Where should I place calls from Stephanie in that 'emergency' queue?" Tank wasn't being smart mouthed. This information was vital to his personal wellbeing.

"Tell her I'm off-line and take a message." With that, Ranger turned and headed for the elevator and the garage.

He decided on the Cyanne. The Turbo would be more impressive at the face-to-face but getting in and out would look rather pathetic. As it was, he gritted his teeth as he stepped up into the SUV and headed north to Lawrence.

The meeting lasted three anguishing hours, during which Ranger sucked up every ounce of soldier he had in him. When he sat back in the Cyanne he let out an involuntary sigh. _This is it. No more. I've got to talk to her tonight. I give up. She wins. I need to stop at a drug store and look for diaper rash cream, for Cripes sakes! _And then, fate took over.

Ranger saw the sign ahead and a light bulb flashed in his exhausted mind. "Marriott Suites" was the answer to his prayers. _Why didn't I think of this before? It's so simple. All I need is some rest and I will be back to my prolific self!_ He registered as Carl Santiago, one of his personal aliases, requesting a room with whirlpool tub. _This will be great!_

Half an hour in the tub and he felt like all his body parts were back to normal. After leaving a wake-up call for 3 o'clock, he stripped and went to bed. Ranger was in deep sleep within minutes. He woke refreshed and feeling like his old self. _I should have thought of this days ago. I didn't need friggin pills. I'm back. Bring it on, Babe. I'm ready._

3:40 found Ranger back on the floor and looking fit and feisty. He nodded as he walked past Tank and went right to his office. The intercom buzzed as soon as he sat down at his desk. It was Tank.

"Everything OK"

"Just great. The meeting was very successful. The client was so impressed he wants estimates for his Albany and Philadelphia locations."

"You were gone a long time. I was just giving a Stephanie check."

"Oh, did she call?"

"No, I figured you two had 'lunch' plans." Tank wasn't known for his subtleness.

"I haven't seen her since this morning. That's odd. This week, by this time of the day she'd have me down at least two quarts!" And then Ranger did the unexpected…he laughed.

Tank was very worried. His boss, who was at celibacy's door this morning, had a miracle-like recovery. He seemed hale and hearty and in an unusually good mood. _Things have either improved or about to go south rather rapidly. I think I'll just stay low and out of the line of fire until Monday. I can always pick up the pieces then._ Tank looked at the clock. One more hour and his weekend would begin. He wondered how far from Trenton he would have to be to avoid the up-coming holocaust. *

* To my readers: the term holocaust is used in small letters, defined by Webster as: "a complete destruction especially by fire" It is in no way a reference to The Holocaust of WWII and the terrible scar it left on humanity.


	9. Chapter 9

CHAPTER 9

Ranger was in his den when he heard Stephanie enter the apartment. _Deep breath, man. Game on! _"I'm in here, Babe". He actually was happy to see her. Despite the grueling physical demands of the past week, he enjoyed her company in the evenings. A replay of her daily adventures was better than any television show and much more enlightening.

Steph was her animated self as she bounded into the den and enveloped him in a hug. "Miss me?"

"_Always"_. Where were you this afternoon? I made time for you and waited for your call." _OK it_ was a lie. _But just a white lie to make her feel good. That can't be bad._

"I was busy. I wanted nothing to interfere with this weekend." _OK it was a lie. But just a white lie to make him feel good. That can't be bad. _"I hope I didn't mess up your afternoon. If I did I'm really sorry." _There, that's not a lie; so it cancelled out the little one._

"I found a way to keep busy." _Sleeping is busy if you do it right. _"So, let's eat and you can tell me about today's exciting capture. Later we'll do dessert, Manoso style." He delivered this last line with a hint of smut in his voice.

"I'm starved. What's on the menu tonight?" Steph moved away from Ranger and headed for the kitchen.

"Now or later" Ranger laughed.

"You know, sometimes you can be just a bit too much!"

"I can be a bit too much! Look whose talking!"

"What do you mean by that remark?" All humor had vanished from her face and her voice had raised a half an octave.

_Shit! Thin ice here. Be careful don't blow up your whole love life trying to be witty. _"Babe, lately you have had more energy than a room full of kittens. I don't know how you do it!" _Kittens are a good reference…cute, cuddly, and adorable._

"Sorry, I didn't mean to snap at you like that. I'm just so hungry. I never realized how much those mid-afternoon snacks took the edge off." _Awh, kittens. I remind him of kittens, how sweet._

"I think it's stew, fresh bread and a salad. Sit down and I dish up for both of us." _Good thinking, old man. Safe on base again_

"No, no, no let me do it. I'm the little woman in this relationship." _Oh, god! I almost made my self gag on that one. I'm overcompensating. Slow down girl, or he'll know something's up._

"You've been watching Martha Stewart when I'm not looking? Why don't we just help ourselves like always?" _This is starting to get weird. Or maybe I'm just too nervous about later. Baby steps…think in baby steps. Get her fed. Get her loose on wine. Get this over with. _

Dinner was thankfully uneventful. Small talk about the day seemed lacking specifics on both their parts but they laughed about people and events over the last few days. Steph asked if any of the men wondered about Ranger's change in lunch habits. Ranger explained the principle of Rank having its privileges. Steph asked if he would approve if one of his men needed extra time for a 'nooner'. Depending on the man. If Hal asked for the time off for that purpose, Ranger would PAY him for the missed time, just to see the man get laid! Steph forced wine out her nose with that comment. Dinner was fun.

Instead of adjoining to the bedroom immediately after dinning, Steph poured extra glasses of wine and suggested that they sit in the 'comfy' couch for a while and watch the fire in the gas fireplace. "Isn't this so romantic?" she cooed.

After their third glass of wine; there was no place else to go but the bedroom. _Shit, I feel fine. But I've got nothing going on where it counts!_ Ranger was concerned. His "flag" wasn't even at half-mast. _I just need some serious foreplay. I can't be used up now! _

_Damn, I just can't do this. I have to tell him. But he seems to be enjoying this week so much. I thought he would be spent by now, but last night he almost made a cripple out of me. I can't believe he is so virile! He may be too much for me._ "Let me take a shower. I want to be at my best for you." _Time, I just need a little more time. The sex drive disappeared by Wednesday but Ranger seems to be enjoying all this animal lust. I don't want him to think that he settled for a prissy instead of a pussy._

"Want company?" he asked. Thinking all the while:_ Please say no. Give my guys a little more time. Maybe I can coax them with a little manual encouragement._

"No. You just settle yourself in bed. I'll join you in a few minutes." _Maybe the massage feature on the shower will help get me in the mood. Why couldn't my period come early? NO! Damn pills keep me as regular as a clock. And he keeps track._

Twenty minutes later, Stephanie slid under the covers and over Ranger. He was on his back waiting for her. "Whoa! You went too far. You missed your mark." He laughed.

"I like you on top. You drive and I'll follow."

This was a problem for both of them. Ranger's body refused to comply with any commands…sexual or otherwise. His legs, still recovering from rug-burn from last night, did not want any pressure applied to them. Steph's "little man in the boat" had swollen to "big man in a yacht" and was in no mood for any twitting.

After minutes of changing positions and "ouch, don't do that" Ranger stopped.

He sat up and in an exasperated voice said, "OK, I give up. You win. I just can't do it tonight without help."

"What do you mean…I win!"

"Babe, I love you. I really do. But there just isn't any sperm left in my sperm-bank. My back is killing me. My legs and arms have second degree rug-burn and I am exhausted."

"I don't believe this is the same man who practically screwed me to death last night! I thought I would need a cane to walk today! What happened between last night and tonight?"

"Truth is, I wasn't sure I could perform last night. I had help by way of a little blue pill. It was the only way I could get it up. I'm sorry but I really wasn't in control of the situation last night. I was just along for the ride."

"You needed Viagra to make love to me!"

"No, Babe, I took a pill so I could make love to you. There's a difference."

"No there's not. What do you mean 'I win'? This isn't some kind of contest! I thought you and I were making love or at least having good sex! Don't you realize how awful this has been for me? Do you think it was easy trying to function all day not knowing if I would spontaneously combust into orgasm? And it wasn't even you making love to me…it was some pill!"

She got out of bed, grabbed his discarded tee shirt from the floor and put it on while marching, indignantly into the living room.

_It's over. There's no way of putting this back together. Your damn pride just killed the best thing you ever had going for you. Manoso you are an asshole._

He put on his pants and headed for the living room; preparing to have his ass handed to him in a basket…and he felt like he deserved it.


	10. Chapter 10

**CHAPTER 10**

He found Steph standing in the living room. Her back was towards him. Her face was buried in her hands and he could see her body wrenching with emotion. _Damn, I did a good job of hurting her this time. _

"Babe, I'm so sorry. I just wanted you to be happy." He reached out and turned her towards him. _She's gonna kick me in my very sore nuts. I know she is._

"Well then, I guess you succeeded." She removed her hands from her face to reveal a huge grin. She hadn't been crying…she was laughing!

_What the fuck? One of us has lost their mind! _"You're LAUGHING? You think all of this is FUNNY?"

"DON'T YOU? My God, we've been killing each other with love!" _Or at least balls-to-the-wall sex._

The lost-boy look on Ranger was just priceless. Steph watched as a dozen different emotions played across his face. Then 'the light went on' and with it, he began to laugh. They were embracing while holding each other up and both were laughing through tears. They made their way to the comfy couch and their un-finished wine.

Ranger regained composure first and in his best big-dog voice stated "You go first".

"The first couple of days were awful." Seeing the hurt look on his face, Steph quickly added, "not the sex. That was great. It was the constant horniness. I caught myself checking out Vini's ass! Please don't bring that up ever again. (This statement had a world of promised hurt behind it) If you hadn't been there for me I could have ended up in Trenton's 'Hooker Hotel Cell'."

Ranger was smiling. _Babe, you would make a great hooker! If you want to live, Menoso, keep that thought to yourself. _"Go on."

"Well, do you remember the Cherokee incident in the garage?"

_Remember it! That's the straw that broke the camel's back and mine too. _"Yes, yes I do. By the way, all that Yoga has made you very flexible. I didn't know that position was possible in a motor vehicle."

"Thank you. You should try Yoga. You're very stiff sometimes."

His eyebrows were all over his forehead and his eyes were saucers. "Well, yah!"

Steph giggled at her own double entendre. "No, not that! Honestly! Anyway, after that afternoon the horniness went away and I couldn't wait to get home and have a full night of sleep. But when I got to the apartment you were so 'ready'; I didn't have the heart to let you down."

"So you were faking it?"

"NO! When you make love to me, you always find my pleasure spots. The only thing I faked was the sleeping part in the morning. While you were sleeping, I kept peeking to see if your 'concealed weapon was armed'. Thankfully it wasn't loaded."

"That's because I didn't have any bullets left! I had to borrow bullets from the pharmacist."

"You really took Viagra? Why? Dear Lord, you are all I can handle on your own!"

_Think like a stud and be that stud. _"I didn't want you to think that I couldn't handle your problem, like Morelli."

"You just wanted to know that you were better than Joe, that you could out-last him." _Men are such boys at times._

"Well, that too. But I wanted you to be satisfied. And I wanted to be the only 'satisfy-er' on your list."

"There is no list, mi Novio. You ARE my list. You are my whole entire list of lists. But you have to tell me…what was that like? You are so virile normally; you must have felt like Superman!" _Or Batman._

Ranger took a long sip of wine and smiled. _She thinks I'm virile. I still have it. Now, do I tell her the truth or change the subject. Hell, lies almost killed us. The truth couldn't be any worse. Besides, it was kind of funny now that I think about it._

"Honestly, it was like being possessed. My dick had a mind of its own and had found a way to completely bypass my brain. There wasn't a part of my body that didn't hurt and it didn't seem to matter. I prefer having some control but there was none with that shit in my system."

"That's just what I was going through; without the dick part. Now you know how difficult it was for me. You are the only person who can understand how awful it is to be hijacked by your libido! This is wonderful!"

_If I live to be 100, I will never understand the thought processes of this woman. _"Wonderful is how I feel about you, Babe." _Jeeze man, right out of a tacky romance novel._

This got him a great big hug and kiss. _Whatever works! _ "There's something else I have to confess." Steph had her eyes lowered and that sad puppy look. "I wasn't working today. I took the day off and went to my parent's house. I was so sore and tired after last night. I needed a hot bath and some sleep. I told mom and gram that I hurt my back and we only had a shower at the apartment. I needed a long soak in a bubble bath and some sleep. Are you disappointed in me?"

"As long as you are coming 'clean' (he watched as Steph did her trademark eye-roll) I guess I should tell you that I spent the afternoon at the Marriott in a Jacuzzi and in bed sleeping too. We have to work on our communication skills before we are either hospitalized or institutionalized."

"Oh no you didn't…a Jacuzzi! Without me, how could you?"

"Let me get this straight. You aren't mad that I took an afternoon siesta. But you are mad that I was in a Jacuzzi without you?" _How can any man keep sane in a relationship?_

"I'm not mad, just disappointed. I've had this fantasy of making love to you in a bubbly Jacuzzi."

"Some things should be shared…like that fantasy. We do have the week end to ourselves. It won't take but a minute to make reservations." _Oh boy, oh boy. Suddenly I'm not that tired!_

"We can just take our time and let things 'develop' on their own. What a wonderful way to celebrate my week of dieting. Speaking of which, you haven't commented on my flat belly that I worked so hard on." _I can hold my stomach in a little while longer._

"What impressed me more, Babe was your tenaciousness. I know how hard that was for you. Proud of you, Babe." _Funny thing is I AM proud of her for so many things. Teaching this old dog new tricks and new ways of thinking is quite an accomplishment. _"Go pack us some overnight bags and I'll let the 5th know we are 'off line' till Monday."

"Roger that! Thank God no one knows about this week except us. Can you imagine how embarrassing it would be for other people to know what was going on? I wouldn't be able to show my face in public ever again. And what would the guys think if they knew about the Viagra? "Big Dog" would have a very different meaning!" She went into the bedroom to pack.

_Sometimes silence is the best action. Tank would keep his secret. And with luck's help Steph will never meet Takeko. Discretion is the better part of valor._ _Besides there is a Jacuzzi waiting with our name on it. _"Babe, when we get back remind me to see about getting you a big, bubbly bathtub."

Standing in the elevator on the way to the garage, hand in hand they looked like the loving partners of a week ago. They were relaxed and enjoying each other's company again. Through some miracle of true love they had survived a most unusual crisis.


End file.
